what it's like to be forty

i got this request for advice from a member in guys4men.com:
From: gian [history] [block!]
Date: 03 Jun 2008, 20:18
Hi! Interesteing posts you have on your profile.

So just wondering, how's life at 40? I'm 32 and starting to feel lonely =(

and here's my reply which i'd like to share with other thirty-something's who may be feeling a little low that they are still single at their age:

its a happy place to be! because before it was too late, i was able to turn my world around from someone who's main goal in life is to find a lifetime partner to someone who makes something of his life by realizing the next (to finding a lover) thing in his life's prioritites: making indie queer movies.

I actually almost didn't make it here because i was always out there trying to find someone for me and each time i saw a glimpse or a promise of that much coveted "love", I would easily grab it, to a point where the person representing it would be choking from the intensity of my desire to be with someone forever.

Start investing in positive actions, positive seeds that you think will complete you even when there is no one else with you. This is usually the thing that you have a passion for. It is usually a "something" and never a "someone". Usually its a dream you had when you were still innocent until harsh realities turned you into a cynic.
I always believed in the power and romance of the big screen and making movies that are shown on the big screen whether people appreciate it or not, has somewhat completed me.
There is always that person out ther waiting and preparing himself but he will not come into our life as our partner if one of you isn't ready yet.
So, do the things that make you happy and invest in good quality friends.
And if someone comes your way while you are still preparing for the perfect someone, try to relax and just enjoy and support each other. When its time for that person to leave, never think you invested anything nor that you should fight for him to stay. I believe that when his mission has been accomplished, he will have to part ways with you. So do it with less drama. You will realize that you can be friends forever, if only...
strive hard to be truthful and open...
And forty will be the best years of your life...